I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world. But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler–not even to eat with such a one. 1 Co 5:9-11
Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? - 2 Co 6:14
Years back MCI came out with “Friends and Family” allowing you to call anyone in your list of friends. Today T-Mobile has their “Stick Together” plan that allows you to call up to 5 people on any network for free. My question to you is; Who would you list as your 5 closest friends? Write their names down on a sheet of paper. Now put a check mark next to those who are Christians. Now put an asterisk (*) next to the names that attend church. Finally put an exclamation mark next to the names who are active members in a church. Do you have any with an exclamation mark or do most of the names have no mark whatsoever next to them?
For most of us our friends consist of mainly people we meet during our daily lives, without taking into consideration their status as a Christian. Unfortunately a lot of Christians enter into a marriage regardless of their partner’s religious beliefs. Usually the only time Christians associate with other Christians is during Church and Sunday School and maybe the occasional Sunday School or Church social. And when they do have Christian friends, how many still associate with them regardless of their conduct. Why are so many Christians so frivolous about choosing their friends? Why does it even matter?
Influence! That’s why it matters. The people we choose to associate with are the people who will mostly influence our lives. So many Christians today believe that by having non-Christian friends they are working in their lives to bring them to Christ, it is their form of evangelism. And while this method does have merit, it usually works the other way around. Don’t get me wrong, I fully believe that we should befriend non-Christians as this is truly the most effective way to evangelize them. One day I will write on the erroneous methods used by most Churches today, methods driven more by numbers than discipleship. But that’s another article for another day.
No, my point is that non-Christians should not be the make-up of our main circle of friends.When we consort mainly with non-believers, thinking that we are affecting their lives for the better, more often than not they are affecting ours more. Say John Doe spends every Friday night with his friends, non of which are Christians. Since his friends are not Christians chances are their language is not the cleanest it could be. John doesn’t get offended because he knows that they have a different set of standards; they live by the world’s standards, not God’s, or as they say in church “Don’t be surprised when the lost act like they’re lost.” This is where the problem starts. John isn’t offended and therefor tolerates the language. Pretty soon John starts to think that the occasional curse word or two around his friends will be okay, after all they’re used to that sort of language. After time goes by, John starts using the language more and more around his friends and eventually he lets it slip around his family. If something isn’t done at this point then the language will infiltrate into his everyday life.
Now I’ve taken a simple example and taken it to the extreme, but I’ve done this to make a point. When we tolerate improper behavior we become calloused to it and slightly adjust our way of thinking. So now that becomes our new standard. Then we tolerate the next level, become calloused and adjust our standard once again. Don’t believe me? A perfect example is television. In the 1950’s a couple on TV could not be shown together in the same bed, even if they were married. The Munsters were the first married couple to break this tradition. Now not only are married couples shown in bed but complete strangers that meet a a local bar are shown in bed together. It used to be that only after 10 o’clock could sexually explicit material be shown on local TV but now look at the morning and afternoon soaps. Or look at Victoria Secret, it used to be you could only see their wares in a catalog or while passing their store in the mall. Now they have their own fashion show on network TV. Victoria’s secret is no secret anymore! We tolerate more and more each and every day and the envelope gets pushed further and further until we are so far from our original standards that we can’t even remember them anymore and when we do they seem so archaic.
